As Kurzgesagt brilliantly illustrated in their video on changing your life using habits and routines, there are two key players in our decision-making process: the wise planner and the impulsive toddler. While the wise planner is responsible for long-term strategy and decision-making, the impulsive toddler is prone to react to immediate desires and triggers.
Gentle parenting is a parenting philosophy that emphasizes respect, empathy, and kindness in parent-child relationships. How can we apply the principles of gentle parenting to ourselves as adults? Can we use these principles to nurture and care for our own inner “impulsive toddler” towards developing healthy habits and routines?
In this blog post, we’ll explore the connection between the five essential concepts of gentle parenting. We will look at how we can use them to build healthy habits, routines, take care of our mental and physical health, and start living the lives we want to live.
Connection over control
This concept emphasizes the importance of building a connection with ourselves and our inner “impulsive toddler” rather than trying to control our behavior through punishments and rewards. By focusing on building a deeper connection with ourselves, we can better understand our own needs and values. This can help guide our behavior in a more positive direction.
Practice self-compassion and self-forgiveness. Use ChatGPT to write down your thoughts and feelings and explore your emotions in a safe space.
Mindful communication
This principle emphasizes the importance of using positive, clear, and respectful communication with ourselves and others. By practicing mindful communication, we can improve our relationships and build stronger connections with those around us.
Set aside time each week to journal about your feelings and goals. Use ChatGPT to help you reflect on and reframe negative thoughts.
No punishments or rewards
This concept emphasizes the importance of building intrinsic motivation and self-discipline rather than relying on external motivators like punishments and rewards. By focusing on our own internal motivations, we can become more self-directed and self-motivated.
Use the schedule-writing method discussed in our previous blog post. First, plan your week as your “Wise Planner” self. Then guide your “Impulsive Toddler” self to succeed. By sticking to this schedule as much as possible, we can avoid impulsive decision-making and become more self-disciplined.
Also, identify areas where you need to set boundaries with yourself. This could be boundaries around social media use or procrastination. Use ChatGPT to help you develop strategies for setting boundaries and practicing self-discipline.
Empathy and understanding
This principle emphasizes the importance of taking the time to understand our inner “impulsive toddler” and the underlying reasons for their behavior. By practicing empathy and understanding, we can become more self-aware. Then, we will be able to manage our own emotions and behaviors.
Practice self-nurturing activities. Take a relaxing bath or get a massage. If you find yourself procrastinating and not following pre-set routines, take the time to practice these activities while you think about your values and goals. Then, determine if they need to change.
Trust and Autonomy
Gentle parenting emphasizes trusting children and respecting their autonomy, allowing them to make choices and take risks. Similarly, we can learn to trust ourselves and respect our own autonomy. We can allow ourselves to make choices and take risks.
Practice trusting yourself and taking risks, even if they are small ones. Use Make small promises to yourself. For example: promise to take ten deep box breaths every night before going to sleep. The more you keep promises to yourself, the more trust you will develop in yourself. Slowly, build your self confidence to complete bigger and more complex projects.
By applying gentle parenting principles to our own lives, we can nurture and care for our inner “impulsive toddler.” As a result, we can begin to develop healthy habits and routines. I hope this post has inspired you to explore the concepts of gentle parenting and how they can be applied to your own life. Let me know in the comments if you have any other tips or tricks for practicing gentle parenting.
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